After a couple of grumpy days with bone pain following the normal injections chemo 6 was completed yesterday. Actually I was the only one of the three of us who turned up who was allowed to proceed with chemo as the other two had caught infections which had to be treated first. Just goes to show that the low contact high cleanliness routine I have been following has actually paid off. Generally the timing of the chemo injections has been optimised to do the most damage to the cancer that your body can stand so you really want to try to stay on schedule, so far I have only drifted two days which is quite good.
As usual I had a pretty jolly time at the hospital and chatted to the folks around me, all of whom were doing quite well so that started an encouraging trend. Then I found out that the critical PET and CT scans to see how the treatment is progressing will actually be done in early May rather than late may as I had thought (8th PET in Aberdeen and 11th CAT in Edinburgh just before chemo 6 on the 12th). That may mean I have some indication of the prognosis by around the 16th of May or so (three choices seem to exist with different probabilities - still growing 2%, second half of treatment needed 70%, or thats fine you can go 20-30%) so that will be a big milestone for me. I am trying to get my head in the zone that more treatment will be needed so that I do not get my hopes up too much, whatever happens I will need a month or so before my immune system is up to normal interactions once treatment is completed and a bit longer before I can be far away from fast medical support due to immune suppression.
Today I used my steroid boost of energy to move about half a ton of books back into the house from the garage, attempts to bribe Poppy and Holly to help me failed as they found my per hour rate insufficient to drag them away from building a snail garden with some visiting friends, Lee helped out when she did not have to look after our ones and the variable number of others who seemed to come and go all day. Actually Poppy is getting to the age now where she can run round to friends houses and they then stroll back here as we all live within about 500m of each other, so its quite common to turn up and find four of them playing in the garden. Hollys visits still need parental coordination but she is getting pretty good at phoning up organising everything and then telling us the other parent is on the line!
So things are going well, no major reactions to the chemo other than me being grumpy and having some mood swings - specially when I had to take two different flat pack bookshelves back today as one had two left sides and you guessed it the replacement had two right sides. An hours waste of time and both I and the shop ended up with a full set. The good weather today has given me a bit of a blotchy chemo sun tan, hopefully it will fade tomorrow as it is pretty weired looking (more than usual)
Cheers for now
Gerry
Saturday, April 29, 2006
Monday, April 24, 2006
Good days with a cautionary tale
We had a very nice weekend as the weather picked up here in scotland and finally the cherry trees are in blossom (about a month late) and the grass has started to grow enough to get the mower out for the first time. We putted on the cut lawn Poppy Holly and I all trying to beat a hole in three from the upper lawn to the lower one, an effort that put the neighbours windows at some risk but no damage was done. Playing golf is a funny thing for me as I inherited the clubs etc from my dad who was a keen golfer and I always am a little sad to use the clubs, but I know he would rather that they were used. Anyway playing in the sun with the kids I thought he would like the scene his grand daughters taking their first steps learning one of his favourite hobbies.
On Saturday I managed a pint with Shaun at our local pub so was able to catch up with all the gossip from work and just feel normal for a while, we occasionally meet up in the pub when our flying schedules do not intersect and we realise we have not seen each other for a month. Shaun is the R&D leader in Gore Fabrics Europe and a close colleague, fortunatly he lives about a mile from my house! Just after Lee's sister Dot came down from Aberdeen for lunch so she was able to give me even more good advice from her years as a cancer nurse, its really reassuring to talk things over in a relaxed way with an expert as you often forget things when you are with the doctors in the hospital.
I have been feeling very well over the weekend and today, the positive news from the doctors last thursday has helped my spirits and I have managed to avoid any infections so far. Sadly we had a reminder of how important this is as a friend of Lee's in Sweden died just last week half way through chemo for melanoma, he caught a virus which led quickly to pneumonia which his system was not strong enough to fight. It reminded me not to be complacent and to continue to take care with infections. Tomorrow I am heading into the plant, just to see two people with my disinfectant wipes and no handshakes so I should be OK, sometimes its better to see people face to face to talk through issues and help with advice (at least I hope its help!) but I have to balance that with the risk factor.
The good news is that chemo 5 of 6 is on friday, so with the encouragement of the doctors from thursday and the experience of the last chemo I am actually looking forward to getting it over leaving only one in this set to get done. It feels like a major milestone is within sight just like a runner who sees the refreshment stop and puts on a bit of speed. I may even look forward to the injections and the grumpy man reappearing!
So anyway I keep touching wood, keep taking the supplements and keep thinking positivily - it may or may not help but at least it makes me feel better, for that alone it is worth it!
Cheers for now
Gerry
On Saturday I managed a pint with Shaun at our local pub so was able to catch up with all the gossip from work and just feel normal for a while, we occasionally meet up in the pub when our flying schedules do not intersect and we realise we have not seen each other for a month. Shaun is the R&D leader in Gore Fabrics Europe and a close colleague, fortunatly he lives about a mile from my house! Just after Lee's sister Dot came down from Aberdeen for lunch so she was able to give me even more good advice from her years as a cancer nurse, its really reassuring to talk things over in a relaxed way with an expert as you often forget things when you are with the doctors in the hospital.
I have been feeling very well over the weekend and today, the positive news from the doctors last thursday has helped my spirits and I have managed to avoid any infections so far. Sadly we had a reminder of how important this is as a friend of Lee's in Sweden died just last week half way through chemo for melanoma, he caught a virus which led quickly to pneumonia which his system was not strong enough to fight. It reminded me not to be complacent and to continue to take care with infections. Tomorrow I am heading into the plant, just to see two people with my disinfectant wipes and no handshakes so I should be OK, sometimes its better to see people face to face to talk through issues and help with advice (at least I hope its help!) but I have to balance that with the risk factor.
The good news is that chemo 5 of 6 is on friday, so with the encouragement of the doctors from thursday and the experience of the last chemo I am actually looking forward to getting it over leaving only one in this set to get done. It feels like a major milestone is within sight just like a runner who sees the refreshment stop and puts on a bit of speed. I may even look forward to the injections and the grumpy man reappearing!
So anyway I keep touching wood, keep taking the supplements and keep thinking positivily - it may or may not help but at least it makes me feel better, for that alone it is worth it!
Cheers for now
Gerry
Thursday, April 20, 2006
The concept of Camelot
Those of you who know me well will know that I like to think of theories and explanations for why things work in different ways, and to test these in real life. When I was younger I developed the nuclear theory of parties, which actually was pretty successful, not to mention my dinner party strategy for developing "social" connections in small country towns. My Dumfries and EMOT colleagues will probably chuckle at the stories, which are best told after many glasses of red wine, suffice to say that all couples were "neutron rods" which would rule most of us out of invitations to a nuclear party of the Uranium 238 individuals.
Another pet theory of mine is the concept of the "Camelot moment" this is one of those times where the team of people you are with sets aside petty crap, personal agendas, and ass covering and really does something which just feels like someone just hit the turbo boost on life for a short time. Usually its an unusual combination of people who, some how or other, fit together to make more from the combination than is obvious from the parts. I have been very fortunate in my life to be part of a few of these teams, the first plant I was technical leader of, Melinex 1 in Dumfries with Phil Roe (plant manager) and Martin Grady (engineering) was a team like that. We were let play with the plant as it was to be closed, but we turned it round so well that we actually worked all one Easter holiday to buy it from ICI to keep it running - sadly a good lesson in politics for me when we worked out why it had to close. (to cut a long story short we had to make our numbers look good to get the next plant which was good for town - except they forgot to tell us)
Then we had a little plant in Dumfries which did pretty well and I got the feeling again, but the business went to hell and got taken over which left me at Gore. Those first days at Gore were just like Melinex 1, the underdogs get it together, and the team which was there already managed to take a really badly performing plant and turn it around to take on the best in the company. Once again I felt that feeling of "Camelot" where you could challenge each other to be the best, not just to get the job done, but with a feeling of genuine friendship and without disrespect, its like personal feelings were not the main point for a short period of time. Perhaps that is what being in a war is like.
My most difficult Camelot feeling was working in Eau Clare, imagine turning up on the first day when the team feels you are "sent from HQ" and "don't know shit" (both of which were in fact true) but yet you feel in your bones how much better the place could be if you could somehow get past that and get some basic production stuff in place. For more of that story see my reply to Bills post earlier.
Finally the best Camelot feeling I ever had in my life was working on the start up in Shenzhen, we literally walked across the border with our rucsacks (and a lot of money, and Rocco our chinese colleague who was the true star of the show) and left two years later with a great bunch of associates, a kick ass plant which still kicks ass at $50mm a year and friends for life. We had more than 40 associates from all our plants around the world make that happen with a fantasic local team who stepped up to the line to own their future from day one in the door. For a short time we were all like a family.
The point of this story is not these particular successes, but much more important than this and the core of what I believe is the truth behind the Gore culture, which makes it remarkable - if you can truly value people and motivate them and merge their strengths then you can create moments in peoples lives which are not administration of businesses, nor simply the making of profit, but moments when the team is an exhilarating and astounding place to be - those are Camelot moments and I believe we all should try to find and create those moments for they are rare and valuable things in a life full of mundane and administrative tasks.
So to all of you "Camelot" friends, remember what it feels like, and do the magic every time you see the chance to create the mix and to pass on that feeling to others, from my personal observation there is nothing which comes close in your work life and this is the thing which makes work more that just earning money but something which adds value, energy, memories and warmth, the the few times when we can create a true team.
So you can all thank Bill and his sick horse for that line of thought, I guess I am in a happy mood from the good review with the doctors today and looking forward, perhaps prematurely,to seeing friends in China, Germany and the USA again. Working over the telephone is a poor second to talking with people and seeing how they are really doing. So I look forward to seeing you all in a few months and keep me a cold beer and a long chat in reserve.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Another pet theory of mine is the concept of the "Camelot moment" this is one of those times where the team of people you are with sets aside petty crap, personal agendas, and ass covering and really does something which just feels like someone just hit the turbo boost on life for a short time. Usually its an unusual combination of people who, some how or other, fit together to make more from the combination than is obvious from the parts. I have been very fortunate in my life to be part of a few of these teams, the first plant I was technical leader of, Melinex 1 in Dumfries with Phil Roe (plant manager) and Martin Grady (engineering) was a team like that. We were let play with the plant as it was to be closed, but we turned it round so well that we actually worked all one Easter holiday to buy it from ICI to keep it running - sadly a good lesson in politics for me when we worked out why it had to close. (to cut a long story short we had to make our numbers look good to get the next plant which was good for town - except they forgot to tell us)
Then we had a little plant in Dumfries which did pretty well and I got the feeling again, but the business went to hell and got taken over which left me at Gore. Those first days at Gore were just like Melinex 1, the underdogs get it together, and the team which was there already managed to take a really badly performing plant and turn it around to take on the best in the company. Once again I felt that feeling of "Camelot" where you could challenge each other to be the best, not just to get the job done, but with a feeling of genuine friendship and without disrespect, its like personal feelings were not the main point for a short period of time. Perhaps that is what being in a war is like.
My most difficult Camelot feeling was working in Eau Clare, imagine turning up on the first day when the team feels you are "sent from HQ" and "don't know shit" (both of which were in fact true) but yet you feel in your bones how much better the place could be if you could somehow get past that and get some basic production stuff in place. For more of that story see my reply to Bills post earlier.
Finally the best Camelot feeling I ever had in my life was working on the start up in Shenzhen, we literally walked across the border with our rucsacks (and a lot of money, and Rocco our chinese colleague who was the true star of the show) and left two years later with a great bunch of associates, a kick ass plant which still kicks ass at $50mm a year and friends for life. We had more than 40 associates from all our plants around the world make that happen with a fantasic local team who stepped up to the line to own their future from day one in the door. For a short time we were all like a family.
The point of this story is not these particular successes, but much more important than this and the core of what I believe is the truth behind the Gore culture, which makes it remarkable - if you can truly value people and motivate them and merge their strengths then you can create moments in peoples lives which are not administration of businesses, nor simply the making of profit, but moments when the team is an exhilarating and astounding place to be - those are Camelot moments and I believe we all should try to find and create those moments for they are rare and valuable things in a life full of mundane and administrative tasks.
So to all of you "Camelot" friends, remember what it feels like, and do the magic every time you see the chance to create the mix and to pass on that feeling to others, from my personal observation there is nothing which comes close in your work life and this is the thing which makes work more that just earning money but something which adds value, energy, memories and warmth, the the few times when we can create a true team.
So you can all thank Bill and his sick horse for that line of thought, I guess I am in a happy mood from the good review with the doctors today and looking forward, perhaps prematurely,to seeing friends in China, Germany and the USA again. Working over the telephone is a poor second to talking with people and seeing how they are really doing. So I look forward to seeing you all in a few months and keep me a cold beer and a long chat in reserve.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Cancer Wizards Update
So today was my first official consultation with the head cancer wizard at the hospital since I started treatment, so this will be a bit of a boring medical type update unless I divert on to more interesting things as I type.
Basically the news is very good all round, the treatment seems to be working as I am showing all the signs of reacting well to the chemo such as the near distruction of my immue system, no swelling of the lymph nodes or breathing problems which would indicate the cancer in progressing. Hence the doctor was very confident that once the treatment, long or short, was complete I am very likely to get an all clear (about 95 percent or more).
The only dodgy fact was that about 15 percent of those who get an all clear relapse inside five years and have to go on to more aggressive chemo (so rough you are in total isolation in hospital for weeks, read Lance Armstrong's book if you want the blow by blow on this type of chemo) plus stem cell therapy afterwards to put an immune system back into your body. Good fact is that this tends to work in the majority of cases (60-70%) so if it happens we can cope with that, lets hope not !
So now the only dilemma is the length of the treatment, currently my 6th chemo finishes on the 12th of May, then we need to wait 2 weeks before getting CAT and PET scans, so by the end of May or so I get a result and another consultation. In about 30 percent of cases I get no more treatment and after a month or so should be able to get on with life pretty much as normal (early July just in time for well earned summer holidays yipee!)
The most likely situation is that they will find some small residual cancer, or possible cancer, and I will get another round of AVBD chemo (one month) and a dose of radiotherapy (one month) which will consume June and July giving me August to recover and build up my immue system ahead of starting back on the work treadmill in September or so. People say that the need for naps and real recovery of stamina takes a few more months so I will play it a bit more careful on jet lag recovery time for a while (ie not flying overnight to china, getting off the plane at 8am and going straight to work (3am UK time) for a day with the assistance of red bull or Java lava coffee! Mind you I still think that is better than flying economy overnight from the USA when you do that once or twice a month it gets really old after a certain age and time. Perhaps I can use my genuine immune suppression to get an exception from setting a good example for a while.
So all in all the news from the cancer wizards was all good, recovery probability looks good and they were more confident than I thought (doctor said she would be "really quite surprised" if I did not get a positive result at the end of the treatment). There is still the chance of a relapse but they have a plan if that happens, in between I can get fit, eat right take my supplements and meditate hopefully, so at least I will feel like I have some influence on that outcome (even if in reality its just random numbers).
Lee and I went out for a Nepalese curry just to get me out of the house last night, rather sadly as soon as I had eaten (v nice food) I came over all sleepy which happens to me some times so we came back home at about 9.30 having only been out for since 7.30 much to the babysitters surprise. I was tucked up in bed sound asleep by 10pm, so much for my romantic intentions ! I do find that I can pretend to be OK pretty well for about 2 hours or so but just afterwards I crash out on the sofa and nap, not something I could ever have done in the past but just need to do now. However a wee bit of tiredness aside I am fully over the last chemo and now, having done the experiment, swear by my special (horrible tasting) tea and my supplements.
The nurse told me during the last chemo that the people who cope well with the side effects tend to be those who have had rough lifestyles (jet lag, working hard, drinking and partying too much) as these seem to build up an ability to deal with toxins in the blood. So when you more or less stop drinking anything other than the odd glass of wine with a pint of water inbetween like me that capacity is available to fight the chemo. So my jokes about working for Gore setting me up to deal with chemo were not so far off the mark. The people who take it badly tend to be non-drinking, good living, more elderly women according to my nurse anyway.
One of my nurses turned out to be from Dumfries and recognised me from living there 11 years ago, nurses in Dumfries were a happy hunting ground for me in my bachelor days, never managed to catch one just did a lot of pointless prancing around like a cub lion, but we enjoyed it and had minor successes on other fronts. Fortunately she did not indicate that she had been witnesses to any of the more embarrassing frolics, small towns are funny that way the plant manager of my first plant was asked in a morning meeting (20 people or so) "why young Mr Mulligans car was parked at such and such a house when we came in for the start of early shift". I of course went bright red and blustered as the truth was I had been consigned to a friends couch (having thought I might do better) and had come to work in the same clothes I had left in the previous day. Much fun was had at my expense by the married guys as there would always be someone from the ICI factory in any pub I visited.
Actually they had another motive, when I was single, and I lived about 20 miles away from my work, I would just work through to about 7pm and then usually meet up with friends for sports, cinema or just a beer - saved me driving home and making my own dinner as we had a canteen at work. However this gave me lots of time to think up irritating ways to improve the plant which I would spring on the other (married with small children) guys the next morning (I was irritating even then, perhaps more so). After this went on for a few weeks Phil Roe my second plant leader said "for god sake Gerry will you go and get a girlfriend we cant keep up!" So I think they were secretly hopeful that my poor efforts to chat up the nurses would be successful to cheer up their day with gossip and reduce the load in their in trays. In those days we had in trays rather than email and you could measure your backlog in inches rather than red pages.
So anyway enough of my rather ordinary past exploits, you can thank the nurse for that train of thought its made me nostalgic enough that I may take the car down to see some of my friends down there if I can get the water leak fixed, which means I need to get the furniture out of the garage - so that may take a while.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Basically the news is very good all round, the treatment seems to be working as I am showing all the signs of reacting well to the chemo such as the near distruction of my immue system, no swelling of the lymph nodes or breathing problems which would indicate the cancer in progressing. Hence the doctor was very confident that once the treatment, long or short, was complete I am very likely to get an all clear (about 95 percent or more).
The only dodgy fact was that about 15 percent of those who get an all clear relapse inside five years and have to go on to more aggressive chemo (so rough you are in total isolation in hospital for weeks, read Lance Armstrong's book if you want the blow by blow on this type of chemo) plus stem cell therapy afterwards to put an immune system back into your body. Good fact is that this tends to work in the majority of cases (60-70%) so if it happens we can cope with that, lets hope not !
So now the only dilemma is the length of the treatment, currently my 6th chemo finishes on the 12th of May, then we need to wait 2 weeks before getting CAT and PET scans, so by the end of May or so I get a result and another consultation. In about 30 percent of cases I get no more treatment and after a month or so should be able to get on with life pretty much as normal (early July just in time for well earned summer holidays yipee!)
The most likely situation is that they will find some small residual cancer, or possible cancer, and I will get another round of AVBD chemo (one month) and a dose of radiotherapy (one month) which will consume June and July giving me August to recover and build up my immue system ahead of starting back on the work treadmill in September or so. People say that the need for naps and real recovery of stamina takes a few more months so I will play it a bit more careful on jet lag recovery time for a while (ie not flying overnight to china, getting off the plane at 8am and going straight to work (3am UK time) for a day with the assistance of red bull or Java lava coffee! Mind you I still think that is better than flying economy overnight from the USA when you do that once or twice a month it gets really old after a certain age and time. Perhaps I can use my genuine immune suppression to get an exception from setting a good example for a while.
So all in all the news from the cancer wizards was all good, recovery probability looks good and they were more confident than I thought (doctor said she would be "really quite surprised" if I did not get a positive result at the end of the treatment). There is still the chance of a relapse but they have a plan if that happens, in between I can get fit, eat right take my supplements and meditate hopefully, so at least I will feel like I have some influence on that outcome (even if in reality its just random numbers).
Lee and I went out for a Nepalese curry just to get me out of the house last night, rather sadly as soon as I had eaten (v nice food) I came over all sleepy which happens to me some times so we came back home at about 9.30 having only been out for since 7.30 much to the babysitters surprise. I was tucked up in bed sound asleep by 10pm, so much for my romantic intentions ! I do find that I can pretend to be OK pretty well for about 2 hours or so but just afterwards I crash out on the sofa and nap, not something I could ever have done in the past but just need to do now. However a wee bit of tiredness aside I am fully over the last chemo and now, having done the experiment, swear by my special (horrible tasting) tea and my supplements.
The nurse told me during the last chemo that the people who cope well with the side effects tend to be those who have had rough lifestyles (jet lag, working hard, drinking and partying too much) as these seem to build up an ability to deal with toxins in the blood. So when you more or less stop drinking anything other than the odd glass of wine with a pint of water inbetween like me that capacity is available to fight the chemo. So my jokes about working for Gore setting me up to deal with chemo were not so far off the mark. The people who take it badly tend to be non-drinking, good living, more elderly women according to my nurse anyway.
One of my nurses turned out to be from Dumfries and recognised me from living there 11 years ago, nurses in Dumfries were a happy hunting ground for me in my bachelor days, never managed to catch one just did a lot of pointless prancing around like a cub lion, but we enjoyed it and had minor successes on other fronts. Fortunately she did not indicate that she had been witnesses to any of the more embarrassing frolics, small towns are funny that way the plant manager of my first plant was asked in a morning meeting (20 people or so) "why young Mr Mulligans car was parked at such and such a house when we came in for the start of early shift". I of course went bright red and blustered as the truth was I had been consigned to a friends couch (having thought I might do better) and had come to work in the same clothes I had left in the previous day. Much fun was had at my expense by the married guys as there would always be someone from the ICI factory in any pub I visited.
Actually they had another motive, when I was single, and I lived about 20 miles away from my work, I would just work through to about 7pm and then usually meet up with friends for sports, cinema or just a beer - saved me driving home and making my own dinner as we had a canteen at work. However this gave me lots of time to think up irritating ways to improve the plant which I would spring on the other (married with small children) guys the next morning (I was irritating even then, perhaps more so). After this went on for a few weeks Phil Roe my second plant leader said "for god sake Gerry will you go and get a girlfriend we cant keep up!" So I think they were secretly hopeful that my poor efforts to chat up the nurses would be successful to cheer up their day with gossip and reduce the load in their in trays. In those days we had in trays rather than email and you could measure your backlog in inches rather than red pages.
So anyway enough of my rather ordinary past exploits, you can thank the nurse for that train of thought its made me nostalgic enough that I may take the car down to see some of my friends down there if I can get the water leak fixed, which means I need to get the furniture out of the garage - so that may take a while.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Periscope Depth
I seem to be heading for the surface after Chemo 4, nausea has subsided though I am still pretty tired and unfocused in my head, never the less I managed to do a fair bit of work yesterday including a 2-3 hr phone conference with some operations team colleagues and took the car out for a run to visit some friends. The latter turned out to be a bad idea as firstly I discovered that the water system had a leak (so another good reason to get the garage sorted as that will need to be fixed) and I got the wobbles in mid conversation and had to excuse myself and head home while I still could. So in the end I was only out of the house for about two hours or so but on a sunny spring night that was enough to lift my spirits.
My regular readers will remember that at this time after the last chemo I was still groaning under the duvet and in pretty bad shape, this time I have nearly recovered and am able to work. It seems that the main difference is that I was on combination antibiotics which themselves were affecting my system and then were also stopping me taking my normal dose of supplements and Eassic tea. Eassic tea is a native American formulation which seems to work mostly by stabilising your gut which takes a pounding from the chemo as the chemo attacks any rapidly dividing cells. This time round without antibiotics and with vitamins and the tea my symptoms are much much reduced as is my dependence on anti sickness medications.
This Thursday I have my first big consultation with the doctors on the progress of the treatment and the options going forward. Although the first course of treatment is six doses of chemo of which I have two to go, the usual route is a months of radiotherapy and then a further chemo on top of that six which would take me to about July. There is a small chance that the first six doses of chemo are enough and I will get a "get out of jail free card" but I do not want to get my hopes up as this is about a 1 in 4 shot. Anyhow I am looking forward to talking to the doctors about the next steps with four weeks or so of this treatment left (and another 2-4 of convaslence time I feel like I have the bulk of it under my belt and that the remainder is manageable. My two main fears, problems with the veins in my arm and the sickness both seem to be under control so that has helped my mood a lot, also the improving sunny weather and the atmosphere in the new bright and airy kitchen also help a great deal.
So I have to get down to the long list of follow up actions I have from the various pay reviews we have had over the last few weeks, after each of the reviews we have to let the associates know how they have done, how they can improve and what we need them to focus on for the next 6 months, in short lots of one on one phone calls for the next few weeks to keep the show on the road.
Best get on with it then
Cheers
Gerry
My regular readers will remember that at this time after the last chemo I was still groaning under the duvet and in pretty bad shape, this time I have nearly recovered and am able to work. It seems that the main difference is that I was on combination antibiotics which themselves were affecting my system and then were also stopping me taking my normal dose of supplements and Eassic tea. Eassic tea is a native American formulation which seems to work mostly by stabilising your gut which takes a pounding from the chemo as the chemo attacks any rapidly dividing cells. This time round without antibiotics and with vitamins and the tea my symptoms are much much reduced as is my dependence on anti sickness medications.
This Thursday I have my first big consultation with the doctors on the progress of the treatment and the options going forward. Although the first course of treatment is six doses of chemo of which I have two to go, the usual route is a months of radiotherapy and then a further chemo on top of that six which would take me to about July. There is a small chance that the first six doses of chemo are enough and I will get a "get out of jail free card" but I do not want to get my hopes up as this is about a 1 in 4 shot. Anyhow I am looking forward to talking to the doctors about the next steps with four weeks or so of this treatment left (and another 2-4 of convaslence time I feel like I have the bulk of it under my belt and that the remainder is manageable. My two main fears, problems with the veins in my arm and the sickness both seem to be under control so that has helped my mood a lot, also the improving sunny weather and the atmosphere in the new bright and airy kitchen also help a great deal.
So I have to get down to the long list of follow up actions I have from the various pay reviews we have had over the last few weeks, after each of the reviews we have to let the associates know how they have done, how they can improve and what we need them to focus on for the next 6 months, in short lots of one on one phone calls for the next few weeks to keep the show on the road.
Best get on with it then
Cheers
Gerry
Saturday, April 15, 2006
6am Chemo 4 going well
As usual the effects of the cocktail of steroids etc that are given to me with the Chemo have me wide awake so at 6am on a bright saturday morning I am sitting down with my Eassic tea to update the blog. So far I am feeling fine which is some combination of the normal thing just after the chemo, perhaps helped by being off antibiotics and back on my complementary supplements, until I come off the steriods it will be hard to tell, so far so good.
Yesterday went fine, the line went in without trouble (on the other side) and the all important netrophil count was four times over the minimum, so chemotherapy went ahead. Its pretty tedious to sit and have chemicals pumped into you for the full afternoon and hard to concentrate on a book, so, as usual, we fell into chatting with the patients around us. One lady beside me, Francis, had lukemia which had spread to lymphoma and defeated three different types of chemo so now was finishing up this chemo, which made the poor lady (she is 60) very very sick to the point that she ended up in hospital after each of her last three treatments. She was preparing for a stem cell transplant from her brother if this next set did not work, fortunate for her he was a match (only a one in four chance). On the other side was Paul who had survived a liver transplant but got non-Hodgkins lymphoma as a side effect of his rejection supression drugs and was now being treated for that. He had been a soldier in N.Ireland so we chatted about life over there on both sides, so to speak, twenty years ago.
Finally the chemo party girls turned up to support their friend who has Hodgkins like me, so I learnt lots of new slang popular with 17 year old girls, probably that is good preparation for understanding poppy who is now getting into the habit of having deep discussions with Lee about boys, and falling in or out with various girlfriends. I think 10 is a very confusing age for a girl, the combination of still liking to play tig with your younger sister and worrying about getting ears peirced or when you will have your first bra seems tough to me.
Last night we put our kitchen to good use by having an unplanned dinner with our friends Sarah and Jim, christened the new kitchen with some Cava and Sancern for lee, beer for jim and fizzy water for me. Our kids their kids (and a spare one) were spread out across the house and we had a good chat for most of the evening, later Jim and I managed to sneak off to play the opening rounds of the new Laura Croft game on the playstation when no one else was looking. A jolly relaxed time was had by all, except Holly who was a bit ill and ended up taking my place beside Lee for comfort and support, thankfully Poppy had gone with the other family for a sleepover so I stole her bed and avoided being relegated to the couch (in case Holly was infectious).
My mum has headed off to Boston today for her 70th Birthday with her friend Anne whos daughter is working for Air Lingus out there. A nice birthday dinner has been sorted out for her while she is there - Happy Birthday Mum if you get the chance to read this when you are in Boston !
I had a very nice day on Wednesday as I was able to take most of the day as a holiday from work apart from a few phone calls from starbucks, unusually for me I went shopping and visited a local art gallery, had some spanish tapas for tea on my way home and went to the MG club meeting in the evening. It was a sort of idylic day and a different "type of time" without any hard schedule or anyone else to please, as Lee and the girls were still away. I think the concept of different types of time is a really good one and important to avoid having a well organised work life and a well organised home life which feels just like work but with the tasks changed from "write up report" to "repaint the front room". Specially when you factor in picking up and droping off childeren, homework it can feel like you are always "doing duty" as lee puts it and not so much "having fun".
So one of my intentions, which has been around for a while, but which I am taking more seriously after all this, is to find a balance of different types of time, rather than different types of busy. So I am looking to include "indulgent time", "hobby time", "outdoor time", "proper relaxing time", "friends time" and "exilariting time". The key thing for me about these types of time is that you cannot box them in on a filofax to specific clock hours, as the time passes differently lying on your back watching the clouds drift by, and you cannot tell in minutes how long is enough, so to do this right I think we need some days which are not scheduled in a firm way but are free to flex with different types of time.
So now my Eassic tea has settled I am off for my porridge with essential oils, maple syrup, fruit juice and other healthy options followed by some time in the garden starting to get it in shape for the growing season which seems to be just upon us here in Edinburgh. That will get me some outdoor time, some exercise time and perhaps I will sneak in watching the clouds or the birds go by .. but don't tell !
PS Holly is fine, she has just come in with her blanket, turned on the TV, asked for breakfast and remined me I have to take her to her friends at 10am, so much for plans, peace and quiet !
Cheers
Gerry
Yesterday went fine, the line went in without trouble (on the other side) and the all important netrophil count was four times over the minimum, so chemotherapy went ahead. Its pretty tedious to sit and have chemicals pumped into you for the full afternoon and hard to concentrate on a book, so, as usual, we fell into chatting with the patients around us. One lady beside me, Francis, had lukemia which had spread to lymphoma and defeated three different types of chemo so now was finishing up this chemo, which made the poor lady (she is 60) very very sick to the point that she ended up in hospital after each of her last three treatments. She was preparing for a stem cell transplant from her brother if this next set did not work, fortunate for her he was a match (only a one in four chance). On the other side was Paul who had survived a liver transplant but got non-Hodgkins lymphoma as a side effect of his rejection supression drugs and was now being treated for that. He had been a soldier in N.Ireland so we chatted about life over there on both sides, so to speak, twenty years ago.
Finally the chemo party girls turned up to support their friend who has Hodgkins like me, so I learnt lots of new slang popular with 17 year old girls, probably that is good preparation for understanding poppy who is now getting into the habit of having deep discussions with Lee about boys, and falling in or out with various girlfriends. I think 10 is a very confusing age for a girl, the combination of still liking to play tig with your younger sister and worrying about getting ears peirced or when you will have your first bra seems tough to me.
Last night we put our kitchen to good use by having an unplanned dinner with our friends Sarah and Jim, christened the new kitchen with some Cava and Sancern for lee, beer for jim and fizzy water for me. Our kids their kids (and a spare one) were spread out across the house and we had a good chat for most of the evening, later Jim and I managed to sneak off to play the opening rounds of the new Laura Croft game on the playstation when no one else was looking. A jolly relaxed time was had by all, except Holly who was a bit ill and ended up taking my place beside Lee for comfort and support, thankfully Poppy had gone with the other family for a sleepover so I stole her bed and avoided being relegated to the couch (in case Holly was infectious).
My mum has headed off to Boston today for her 70th Birthday with her friend Anne whos daughter is working for Air Lingus out there. A nice birthday dinner has been sorted out for her while she is there - Happy Birthday Mum if you get the chance to read this when you are in Boston !
I had a very nice day on Wednesday as I was able to take most of the day as a holiday from work apart from a few phone calls from starbucks, unusually for me I went shopping and visited a local art gallery, had some spanish tapas for tea on my way home and went to the MG club meeting in the evening. It was a sort of idylic day and a different "type of time" without any hard schedule or anyone else to please, as Lee and the girls were still away. I think the concept of different types of time is a really good one and important to avoid having a well organised work life and a well organised home life which feels just like work but with the tasks changed from "write up report" to "repaint the front room". Specially when you factor in picking up and droping off childeren, homework it can feel like you are always "doing duty" as lee puts it and not so much "having fun".
So one of my intentions, which has been around for a while, but which I am taking more seriously after all this, is to find a balance of different types of time, rather than different types of busy. So I am looking to include "indulgent time", "hobby time", "outdoor time", "proper relaxing time", "friends time" and "exilariting time". The key thing for me about these types of time is that you cannot box them in on a filofax to specific clock hours, as the time passes differently lying on your back watching the clouds drift by, and you cannot tell in minutes how long is enough, so to do this right I think we need some days which are not scheduled in a firm way but are free to flex with different types of time.
So now my Eassic tea has settled I am off for my porridge with essential oils, maple syrup, fruit juice and other healthy options followed by some time in the garden starting to get it in shape for the growing season which seems to be just upon us here in Edinburgh. That will get me some outdoor time, some exercise time and perhaps I will sneak in watching the clouds or the birds go by .. but don't tell !
PS Holly is fine, she has just come in with her blanket, turned on the TV, asked for breakfast and remined me I have to take her to her friends at 10am, so much for plans, peace and quiet !
Cheers
Gerry
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Preparing for Chemo 4
It seems like no time since Chemo 3 and I find myself just ahead of the preparations for Chemo 4 on Friday (hopefully). Since the last chemo I have been suffering from some pain in my wrist due to inflammation of the blood vessel, thankfully Dot has checked out the symptoms and has confirmed its sore but harmless. The action plan is simply to go to the other side next time so I can have a matching pain.
Plans changed over the weekend as Lee wanted to go to a science festival thing and I had a phone meeting today so we did not go to the cottage instead Lee has gone up today to see her mum and dad and I have stayed home with Joe the builder to catch up on some work, make the MG club meeting and start injecting myself with bone pain formulae from tomorrow morning. This way they can stay up longer as I have to be back for blood sampling thursday morning, and I get a few days of peace and quiet at home. This turns out to be fortunate as Poppy has just developed a cold so it keeps her away from me when she is most infectious.
Philip and Debbie came over for lunch saturday, it was the first time I had seen Philip, my brother, since the diagnosis so it was good for us to catch up, our first entertainment in the new kitchen. Last night my friend Nick called over for a chat before heading off to Ireland and we bemoaned the "falling to bits" of our bodies while having a beer in true old man style. In truth I started falling to bits earlier than most thanks to falling into a fire when I was two but its only really struck me in the last few years as I accrue injuries that I know will be limiting for the future.
So I have a day off from work tomorrow and will concentrate as usual on good diet, exercise and meditation to try to get my head in a good space for Friday. Its funny with Chemo that you begin to dread the treatment a little, as you willingly do something that is going to make you sick, in the sense of symptoms/nausea etc, it kind of runs against the grain, but as we have said before in these pages there is no road but this road, so get over it and get on with it! I hope it is dry tomorrow as one of my favourite forms of meditation is to clean and polish my MG really well in time for tomorrows club meeting, for me time just flies by when I do this. I think moving things back into the kitchen and the house can wait for another day.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Plans changed over the weekend as Lee wanted to go to a science festival thing and I had a phone meeting today so we did not go to the cottage instead Lee has gone up today to see her mum and dad and I have stayed home with Joe the builder to catch up on some work, make the MG club meeting and start injecting myself with bone pain formulae from tomorrow morning. This way they can stay up longer as I have to be back for blood sampling thursday morning, and I get a few days of peace and quiet at home. This turns out to be fortunate as Poppy has just developed a cold so it keeps her away from me when she is most infectious.
Philip and Debbie came over for lunch saturday, it was the first time I had seen Philip, my brother, since the diagnosis so it was good for us to catch up, our first entertainment in the new kitchen. Last night my friend Nick called over for a chat before heading off to Ireland and we bemoaned the "falling to bits" of our bodies while having a beer in true old man style. In truth I started falling to bits earlier than most thanks to falling into a fire when I was two but its only really struck me in the last few years as I accrue injuries that I know will be limiting for the future.
So I have a day off from work tomorrow and will concentrate as usual on good diet, exercise and meditation to try to get my head in a good space for Friday. Its funny with Chemo that you begin to dread the treatment a little, as you willingly do something that is going to make you sick, in the sense of symptoms/nausea etc, it kind of runs against the grain, but as we have said before in these pages there is no road but this road, so get over it and get on with it! I hope it is dry tomorrow as one of my favourite forms of meditation is to clean and polish my MG really well in time for tomorrows club meeting, for me time just flies by when I do this. I think moving things back into the kitchen and the house can wait for another day.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Climbing new heights
Today was a very nice day, after two days of working early (China stuff) and late (Arizona stuff) with colleagues on the phone (dont get me wrong after last weekend feeling good enough to work is just brilliant and I actually enjoyed all of it). The day was good for a number of reasons:
- As Lee was at a conference I was in charge for the day so I took the girls climbing at Ratho and all three - Poppy Holly and Lucy (poppys friend) made it to the top of the pink climb 50feet up, more than once. Actually we climbed from 11 until 4pm which was a lot of fun for all, I doubt I could have made it to 20feet myself but holding the rope on the ground was easy work, little Holly making it to the top was a treat. Our two are sleeping like zombies as a result tonight.
- I had my first glass of wine in three weeks, now being off the deadly antiboitics for 48 hours and feeling like a minor celebration I had a glass with my lunchtime sandwhich just to feel normal again. These little acts of rebellion keep me going.
- I met my old friend Sam for lunch and we chatted, in the comfortable way you can only do with folks you have a lot of history with, about things we both were worried about in Asia - it happened by coincidence that there was a Gore meeting at the same climbing centre - I only found out about it the day before from Sam that he was in the same place and not in the USA, he is also someone who is working through some health issues, and we set up things in China together, so to see him face to face I enjoyed a lot.
- Finally regular readers of the blog will know this was the evening for House on TV so a mellow evening was had by all (Lee out at Motzart with our friend Ian).
Poppy made the mistake of thinking I was watching the TV to discuss on the phone all the ins and outs of the various boyfriends and relationships with a close friend in the same room, so now I have the full scoop for Lee on the up to the minute situation in school romance!
Other than that all is well on the health front, some colleague still look at me funny when I dont shake hands, (sorry Tom and Carole anne) but that is usually fine when I explain, otherwise to the outside I am fine and my digestive system is returning to normal slowely. By the way here are my personal top tips for avoiding infection while not living in a bubble and trying to enjoy meeting your friends:
- Do not shake hands or hug your friends meet in open rather than crowded spaces.
- Have your own towel in the house and keep it outside the casual reach of the bathroom
- Wash your hands a lot and try not to touch hands to mouth/nose (try it, its hard)
- Open doors with your sleeve not your hand
- Push buttons with the top of your car key (good trick learnt from SARS in HK)
- Use hot air dryers in public loos
- Stay away from anyone who is spluttering sick of any kind
- If you do have a sick visitor clean doorknobs, keyboards cups etc with antiseptic once they leave.
So far that has kept me in good shape and allowed me to visit work/see friends despite low immune function, and not cause offence, I think the eye infection was from the dust I cleaned up and the tooth problem was probably ready to happen just needed the immune depression to get a hold. Fingers crossed I can keep it up for the next eight weeks and get to the other side of this thing !
So all in all things are good, there are a few close colleagues around the world I am feeling the need to visit and talk to in a way you just cannot do over the phone, to see how they are really feeling about things that are worrying me me, the feeling of disconnection is growing, but the phone helps a lot. In some ways its OK to be on the phone to folks in Arizona, in that you can say what you need to say, but you miss all the reactions, passion and body language, feeling and outside hours chances to straighten out misunderstandings. So thanks to the colleagues who have to put up with the disembodied voice on the phone, hopefully unlike Bernise tells me happened in ER, I will not get put in a cupboard ! Perhaps I deserve that.
Andy sent me the Pete Goss book (see earlier) about his adventures in the round the world race which I am looking forward to reading in my week off next week, and Kenny and Feldma have got me back into Neil Diamond, thanks to all of you for the kind cards and notes they all really help.
Cheers for now
Gerry
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Up for Air !
Thankfully I am coming up for air after chemo 3 and just about begining to feel normal, the last couple of days were a bit of a trip all round. However I woke up this morning to a blue, blue sky without any clouds (like you get in the US all the time, but almost never in Scotland) and a similiar bright mood of relief in my head and my stomach.
Last night I spoke to my brother Philip and he is coming over from Ireland with Debbie for lunch Saturday (on his way to a party in Glasgow) so that plus some other social plans on Friday are giving me some good things to look forward to, we will probably head up to Lee's parents in Aberdeen for the first part of easter week before I have to come back for all the usual tests and injections leading up to chemo 4. We like going to the cottage to replenish spiritual energy, I guess in the USA you would call it a cabin, it is deep in the woods and a safe haven for the girls to run and skip and scare deer. Because of it, and the wildlife around it Lee's mum is called "squirrel granma" in our house.
I walked down to the local shop for crossants first thing this morning, holly calls them "horns" because of the shape, I really like that aspect of living in the city when you can "nip out" for fresh coffee or pasteries (or anything in this neighbourhood from ceramic pots to chinese fish shops). So today will be spent looking after Holly, currently building her train set round my desk, catching up on a mass of red emails, and then chatting to some colleagues in Arizona in the afternoon where its 2.30am at the moment !
One of my American colleagues emailed me a funny story about the "f" word which one of her childeren thought was "fart", it remined me of living in the mid west when I would replace the f word with "oh really" and it seemed to go down just about right. The US is a surprisingly polite culture despite what the rest of the world sees on TV and has a majority of really nice people tucked in amoung what can be a loud and macho minority.
Anyway I am off to brew my first and only coffee of the day, which I have not thankfully lost the taste for. Hope your day is on the up and up as well
Cheers
Gerry
Last night I spoke to my brother Philip and he is coming over from Ireland with Debbie for lunch Saturday (on his way to a party in Glasgow) so that plus some other social plans on Friday are giving me some good things to look forward to, we will probably head up to Lee's parents in Aberdeen for the first part of easter week before I have to come back for all the usual tests and injections leading up to chemo 4. We like going to the cottage to replenish spiritual energy, I guess in the USA you would call it a cabin, it is deep in the woods and a safe haven for the girls to run and skip and scare deer. Because of it, and the wildlife around it Lee's mum is called "squirrel granma" in our house.
I walked down to the local shop for crossants first thing this morning, holly calls them "horns" because of the shape, I really like that aspect of living in the city when you can "nip out" for fresh coffee or pasteries (or anything in this neighbourhood from ceramic pots to chinese fish shops). So today will be spent looking after Holly, currently building her train set round my desk, catching up on a mass of red emails, and then chatting to some colleagues in Arizona in the afternoon where its 2.30am at the moment !
One of my American colleagues emailed me a funny story about the "f" word which one of her childeren thought was "fart", it remined me of living in the mid west when I would replace the f word with "oh really" and it seemed to go down just about right. The US is a surprisingly polite culture despite what the rest of the world sees on TV and has a majority of really nice people tucked in amoung what can be a loud and macho minority.
Anyway I am off to brew my first and only coffee of the day, which I have not thankfully lost the taste for. Hope your day is on the up and up as well
Cheers
Gerry
Sunday, April 02, 2006
That's more like it
When I was first due to get chemo I read lots of accounts from folks who had been through it before to try to prepare myself for the experience. As it happened Chemo1 and 2 were pretty mild in the extent of the side effects and this lulled me into a false sense of security. Chemo 3 is turning into the real McCoy as per the textbook.
To get started I had to inject myself in the stomach with growth factor to get my white blood cells up, that in turn causes deep bone pain (where you grow your white blood cells) so I grump around like an old man occasionally letting slip the odd F word. The painkillers, which just take the edge off so are not appropiatly named at all, make you woosey. Bring on the toothache and the elephant killer antibiotic cocktail which eliminates all normal stomach function, my one unit of alchol allowance and my eassic tea (due to alchol in the tincture) and I am a walking growling sore headed, pharmacy.
All of that ahead of when they stuck the needle in and dump poisions in your bloodstream for four hours to make you better. Understandably my body does not comprehend the long term good this is doing me (ie not dying in two years which would be the average for untreated Hodgkins) and reacts big league to all this violation of normal protocol.
So taking stock on day three after chemo 3 there are good and bad observations. Primary good one is I have not yet lost my hair despite all prior patients going down that path, perhaps its just a matter of time, also good is I can put my mood swings down to the chemo and everyone still has to be nice to me (except they do not all understand that as Holly just said "you be mean!" when I tripped over her boots for the third time after telling her to put them in her room and turned off the TV to finally get them moved). Lee has bore the brunt of my grumpyness, with good humour as usual and continues to have to do the majority share of looking after the kids in these days when I am out for the count.
Bad observations include watching the clock until I am allowed to take my anti nausea pills as for the last few hours beforehand I feel increasingly like I have swallowed a pint of motor oil and its all about to return at speed. My wrist hurts like hell where the drip was and upstream so I think I have some bruising or chemo burn to the vein. Finally I have no energy at all, its pathetic I get up, get dressed, have something to eat or drink and then I wobble to the couch or bed and crash out for 5 hours or more - but I feel like I just put my head down for a moment.
So now its 8pm on sunday night and I feel like I have just got up for breakfast, well not really, having written this I feel like just putting my head down for another moment....Sometimes I feel it would be great if the medics could just knock you out for this bit and wake you up when its all over with a thumbs up or thumbs down, its so frustrating being ill and weak and not getting the things done you want to get done. Anyway enough of that grim stuff, I think I will try to get out for a short walk just to blow away the cobwebs and regain some harmony, a good thing is that there is still some light in the sky even at 8pm, finally after weeks of cold weather it is getting warm, soon the lawnmower will be getting its first outing of the year.
Hopefully by Tuesday I will be back in good shape, till then I will do my best not to play the part of the grumpy old man ! Lees friend Liz is going to take her out for a glass of wine later to give her a well deserved break from dust, decorations, me and the kids. I think that getting away from the intensity of the treatment calander, complications and chemo is important if we are all to remain sane. So far we have not booked anything for the Easter week but if all goes well a few days away in a nice hotel may be the treat we all need. I'll keep you posted on that front.
Cheers
Gerry
Regards
Gerry
To get started I had to inject myself in the stomach with growth factor to get my white blood cells up, that in turn causes deep bone pain (where you grow your white blood cells) so I grump around like an old man occasionally letting slip the odd F word. The painkillers, which just take the edge off so are not appropiatly named at all, make you woosey. Bring on the toothache and the elephant killer antibiotic cocktail which eliminates all normal stomach function, my one unit of alchol allowance and my eassic tea (due to alchol in the tincture) and I am a walking growling sore headed, pharmacy.
All of that ahead of when they stuck the needle in and dump poisions in your bloodstream for four hours to make you better. Understandably my body does not comprehend the long term good this is doing me (ie not dying in two years which would be the average for untreated Hodgkins) and reacts big league to all this violation of normal protocol.
So taking stock on day three after chemo 3 there are good and bad observations. Primary good one is I have not yet lost my hair despite all prior patients going down that path, perhaps its just a matter of time, also good is I can put my mood swings down to the chemo and everyone still has to be nice to me (except they do not all understand that as Holly just said "you be mean!" when I tripped over her boots for the third time after telling her to put them in her room and turned off the TV to finally get them moved). Lee has bore the brunt of my grumpyness, with good humour as usual and continues to have to do the majority share of looking after the kids in these days when I am out for the count.
Bad observations include watching the clock until I am allowed to take my anti nausea pills as for the last few hours beforehand I feel increasingly like I have swallowed a pint of motor oil and its all about to return at speed. My wrist hurts like hell where the drip was and upstream so I think I have some bruising or chemo burn to the vein. Finally I have no energy at all, its pathetic I get up, get dressed, have something to eat or drink and then I wobble to the couch or bed and crash out for 5 hours or more - but I feel like I just put my head down for a moment.
So now its 8pm on sunday night and I feel like I have just got up for breakfast, well not really, having written this I feel like just putting my head down for another moment....Sometimes I feel it would be great if the medics could just knock you out for this bit and wake you up when its all over with a thumbs up or thumbs down, its so frustrating being ill and weak and not getting the things done you want to get done. Anyway enough of that grim stuff, I think I will try to get out for a short walk just to blow away the cobwebs and regain some harmony, a good thing is that there is still some light in the sky even at 8pm, finally after weeks of cold weather it is getting warm, soon the lawnmower will be getting its first outing of the year.
Hopefully by Tuesday I will be back in good shape, till then I will do my best not to play the part of the grumpy old man ! Lees friend Liz is going to take her out for a glass of wine later to give her a well deserved break from dust, decorations, me and the kids. I think that getting away from the intensity of the treatment calander, complications and chemo is important if we are all to remain sane. So far we have not booked anything for the Easter week but if all goes well a few days away in a nice hotel may be the treat we all need. I'll keep you posted on that front.
Cheers
Gerry
Regards
Gerry
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